I recently met a woman in her early 60s who shared with me her concerns about political developments and the future. In view of the uncertainties of our time, her conclusion was: enjoy every day, make as much of it as you can while you are healthy, invest in your health and take each day as it comes. Then we talked about aging and the fact that as we get old, we may need care and assistance, some day. Two factors cloud this prospect: demographics – at least in some countries. Who will take care of us? There will be many more old people than young ones. We cannot expect our children to take care of us if they can at all. The other factor is certainly money: care will become more expensive, and our lives will be longer compared to previous generations. And then the woman said something to me that shocked me: if necessary, one would have to give dying a helping hand. I have heard this argument more often recently. There are countries where euthanasia has become more accepted and common, for example in Switzerland and the Netherlands. As much as life is endangered at the beginning, so it is now at its end.
If life is just consuming, enjoying, making the most of our days, one consequently will stop it when this objective cannot be fulfilled anymore. As I listened to this woman, I wondered how I would react in such a situation. There are already phases of suffering or pain in earlier years that, seen from this perspective, would not be worth living. What helped me during these phases? Prayer. The Eucharist. The conversation with God, to whom I can entrust all my thoughts and feelings. People who walk with me and hope with me. I wonder how this life can be bearable without faith, especially in difficult days. To be honest, I am not free of concerns about the future, but I hope that God, who gave me this life, will take care of me. With His help, I and we will find ways to live a dignified life until the day it ends. I realized once again how precious our faith is and how it changes our outlook on life.
Lord, let your angels be near all old people. Let them be cared for. Bless their lives, even when they no longer seem to have any meaning. Let us stand with respect for the suffering that an old person must endure. Who understood Your suffering on the cross when you were going through it, Lord? No one. And did it make sense in the end? More than make sense. My Lord, take away my fear. Let me never give up hope, for my life, for this world. Your future is not dark. Let me enjoy each day gratefully, with you. It is all grace.
Wilde Monk 
Fr Wilde,As an eighty one year old woman I have been thinking more about my death
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I am also a woman in my 60s and have been thinking about this. Feeling SO grateful for my health and many blessings in life, I have felt remiss in offering myself for the salvation of others as Jesus did. I was kind of thinking I was saving that for my older years. On that note, I was just praying that I will suffer and will offer it and it will be useful in God’s plan. Maybe I am naive that I could handle it. But I trust in God’s plan. And if my suffering is part of that then I do not want to disappoint Him.
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Thank you for sharing this. I have been reading about how we are able to send love to another in need by loving them. I like to believe that we are able to do this in our old age and when we are unable to do physical things for others we will still be able to send our love. My hope is that I can do this with God’s intervention up to the time He calls me home. I realize how easy it is to take on another’s negative feelings and messages so why will it not work to send our love and peace. May God give me the grace to love and heal others and complete what I am not able to do on my own.
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I can only support what you are saying Mauritius. The thought of ending a life because it is old and meant to have no purpose anymore is shocking. I came across a similar experience, when my beloved father became fragile and old and we had to give him in a nursing home for his final weeks. My mum and I went there every day visiting him alternately and spending time with him. These weeks and months were the most valuable ones in my life so far. I would never want to miss them. They were of highest intensity … and brought us a piece of heaven down on earth – besides the grief and pain.
It was heartbreaking though to see that very few people there receive regular visits. They are left to themselves and to the public care. It is so sad and it puts us as a society in front of a big mirror. I have the impression that it’s been turned upside down. Wouldn’t it be much more appropriate to give the greatest respect and dignity back to the departing and ending life? Instead, the impression arises that this very important phase of life, so close to our last hope in heaven and which is often full of suffering and pain, is best being ignored and simply pushed away.
I join in your prayer, may God be with our elderly and watch over them and accompany them on their final journey and let them be accompanied by us. Thank you
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Dear Fr. Mauritius,
I will certainly share this with some of my elderly friends. It is a timely topic. A blog on the meaning of suffering would be a nice companion piece.
May you have a blessed Holy Week and joyous Easter. We will be spending these days in Abbey Niederaltaich, where we are oblates.
With kindest regards, Jean Ritzke Rutherford
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Fr. Mauritius. Thank you for this reflection. I learn something valuable from each of your posts. Our world is intent on erasing suffering (real and perceived) from human existence — just take a pill and all will be well. However, suffering is one of the greatest teachers. Where will we find ourselves when we no longer have the opportunity or ability to confront our own suffering or that of others, especially those close to us?
Sincerely,
Eric M.
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